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Second Dates

Did you know that today is the most popular day for shopping on the internet? No wonder my internet dating connection was so slow this morning...

I've got no idea whether the popularity of the internet on this Monday morning is reflected in the popularity of the online dating services, but it did get me thinking... I was chatting to a chap that I went for a first date with last week, and I realised anew how awkward second dates can be, and no more so than when you've met on an online dating site.

Don't get me wrong, I think that the online personals sites are brilliant for meeting people, but you do have a tendency to 'over share' when you've built up a relationship by email. This is fine for the first date - in fact, it's a relief to have a few pointers on which to hang conversation. But come the second date, what the hell do you talk about?

I reckon you need to try something really different for a second date. Ditch the dinner and drinks thing, and try something active (no, not that sort of active - not yet!) But if you get out there and do something like ice skating, a big walk, a concert or museum, at least you've got something to peg the conversation on!  You need at all costs to avoid that stomach-churning moment when you realise that you might actually be interested in dating this person, but you don't have a clue what you're going to say next.

And of course, the second date is fraught with difficulty as to how personal, or intimate, you should get. Call me old fashioned, but I still think it's up to the chap to make the first move, and most blokes can rest assured that if a woman has agreed to go on a second date (especially if you did meet on an online dating site) then she's probably on board with a bit of touch-feeliness, and she'll definitely give you a subtle 'all systems go' signal if that's what she wants!

So I should take my own advice, and embrace that second date and all of the dating possibilities it offers. Let's stop worrying about the chat - conversation's pretty over-rated, when all's said and done.

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